Axel and Luxord's Odd Day
by Le Rusecue
Summary: Axel has one Odd Day, and so does Luxord! All characters are owned by their respective companies.


Luxord, the tenth member of Organization XIII, which had fourteen members, stumbled home, after a long night at work. Well, it was supposed to be work. He was actually just spending his spare Munny at the bar.

When he got inside of the castle, he opened the door to a room, and laid down on the soft mattress. He noticed, that right next to him, was another figure, in a black cloak.

"Roxarse?" Luxord said, noticing who the figure was. "What the." he stopped to hiccup. "Hell are you doing in my bed?" he asked, a slur in his voice.

"Luxord, this is my-" before he could answer the question, Luxord pushed him off of the bed.

"Get out of my bed, you damn pervert!" he exclaimed. Roxas got up.

"Since I'm the younger one, here, you're the pervert!" Roxas retorted.

"Oh, God!" Luxord exclaimed. "Your right!" he said, getting off of the bed. "I am a," he hiccupped again. "Pervert!" he shouted. "I gotta," another hiccup. "Turn myself in!" he shouted. He walked, or rather, stumbled, toward the door.

"Dumbass drunk." Roxas said, laying back on the bed.

-----

The man with blood red spikes pushed his bed against the door.

"I hate it when I piss Xemnas off, damn me for having such an awesome sense of humor!" he shouted, picking up a chair. Suddenly, the door exploded, sending Axel flying backwards, going out the conveniently placed window. He landed in the woods, near the castle.

"Oh man. I gotta hide!" he shouted, running in one direction. He stopped, realizing he was running toward the castle. He ran through the woods, until he tripped over something….. Or was it someone? Seriously, answer me, I don't know, I wasn't there.

"Shit!" a voice shouted. Axel looked around, to try and find the source of the voice. Not finding it, he dusted his cloak off. "Hey, asshole, what the hell!?" the same voice exclaimed. He looked around, trying to pinpoint the voice. "Hey, down here, douche bag!" Axel looked down, seeing a doll with red hair, and several scars on his face. Axel's jaw dropped.

He began to scream, horrified by the small object.

"Calm down, retard!" the doll shouted. Half an hour passed by, Axel screaming all the way through, not even stopping to get a breath of air. "Shut the hell up, you dumbass faggot!" the doll shouted. Axel stopped screaming.

"Hey, I was just experimenting that night!" Axel exclaimed. "And it wasn't gay, there was a girl involved." he said. The doll just looked at him, a look of shock in it's eyes. "Let me tell you why I was scared." Axel said. "As a young boy, I…." several hours passed by. "So, I took a piss on the floor, since I thought no one would be able to tell the difference between water and piss. Unfortunately, I was pissing yellow that day. Now, in the eighth year of my life, I.."

"Tell me the short version, before I make a scary face." the doll said. Axel gasped.

"My mommy said you didn't exist. She also told me that if I smoked, my lungs would fall out. Y'know, my mom told me a lot of stuff, and I think most of them were lies."

The doll nodded. "Okay, think you can tell me why you were running?"

"I need to find a place to hide." Axel said.

"Alright, got straight on, until you reach a rotted oak tree. Turn left, and keep going. There, you'll run into my friend. He's a little weird, though." the doll said. Axel nodded, and ran in one direction. "Wrong way, dumbass!" the doll shouted. Axel ran back.

"Right!" Axel said, running past the doll. The doll then laid back down, where Axel tripped over him.

"Back to work." he said, before sighing. After taking the directions the doll told him, Axel came across a frog sitting on a rock, playing a banjo.

"Excuse me." Axel said. The frog looked up from his banjo. "Can you tell me where to hide?" Axel asked. The frog laid his Banjo to the side, and picked up a 12-gauge shotgun.

"The same way you came back." he said, cocking the shotgun. Axel raised his hands.

"Did I say hide?" Axel asked. The frog nodded, pointing his weapon at him. "I meant, get good fishing supplies!" he exclaimed. The frog lowered his firearm.

"Oh." The frog pointed to the northeast. "Just go that way, you should run into a friend of mine." Axel stood, stunned. His plan actually worked, for once. "Get the hell out!" the frog shouted. Axel ran in the direction the frog pointed.

"Thank you!" he shouted. After the red haired man was gone, a boy in bright green tights flew up to the frog.

"Excuse me, do you know where Neverland is?" the boy asked. The frog pointed his gun at the boy.

"The same way you came back!" he exclaimed.

"I was just there!" the boy shouted. The frog pulled the trigger, sending the boy flying backwards, a hole in his chest.

"Smart ass!" the frog shouted.

Axel walked up to a man. He had completely forgotten about hiding from Xemnas. His mind was now set on going fishing.

"Hello?" Axel said. The man looked to see him. "I heard your good for getting some bait." Axel said.

"You call it bait?" the man questioned. "Yeah, I like that." the man reached into his pocket, and pulled out a small container, filled with several small white pills. Axel grabbed the container and walked away, to find some sticks….. And some string.

A cop car pulled up, and a round blue ball like creature, along with a mustachioed man in blue overalls, stepped out of the vehicle. The man pulled out a baton, and smacked the man upside the head with the object.

"Where's the drugs!?" the man exclaimed, smacking the fallen man with his baton once more.

"I'm not selling any drugs!" the man cried. The two stopped beating him.

"Your not?"

"No!" the man cried.

"Oh, sorry then." the mustachioed man said.

"We gotta kill him." the object said. "He might squeal on us for police brutality." the two men stepped into the vehicle, and then, Mario drove over the fallen man.

-----

Axel sat in his poorly made wooden boat.

"I hope I catch some big fish!" Axel randomly shouted. He wrapped his string around the bait, and cast a line into the ocean.

Meanwhile, deep in the ocean, a crab and a flounder found Axel's 'bait'.

"What is this?" the Jamaican accented crab pondered aloud.

"Let's eat it and find out!" the pre-pubescent flounder exclaimed. The crab cut the line it was hung from, and cut the 'bait' in half. The crab took one half, and popped it in his mouth, along with the flounder. A few seconds later, their eyes turned red, and they began to moan, as they randomly floated away.

Patrick star walked from under his rock, and saw the two floating.

He swam up to the two, or, as his kind would say, flew.

"Do you got any drugs?" Patrick asked. The two just floated away, like zombies. It was then, that a towel fell into the water.

"Wanna get high?" the towel asked, holding out a bong.

"Sure!" Patrick responded, reaching for the bong. The Towel jerked it's arms back.

"Wait a sec, aren't you Patrick star?" the towel asked. Patrick nodded his head. "People say you ain't supposed to get high anymore. They said, that if you get high one more time, you'll turn into a giant beast, again."

-----

Meanwhile, Homer Simpson sped through the streets of a certain city. Next to him, sat his favorite pet, Harry Plopper.

"Plopper, their onto us!" he shouted. Plopper rolled down the window, and shot at the cops. The cops shot back. Homer sped into the water. Seconds afterward, his car exploded, making the pig crap silo on the top, fly into the air.

-----

Axel sat in his poorly made boat.

"Damn, fishing sucks." he said. In the distance, he saw a metal, silo shaped object(With a pig painted on the front) land in the water.

In the ocean below, Patrick and the towel looked to see darkness coming toward them. Just then, the flounder and the crab floated past them. The towel grabbed both of them, and grabbed onto the line. He, along with the fish and the crab, flew up into the air.

"High, here I come!" Patrick shouted, as he swam toward the blackness.

Axel pulled his fishing rod up, a towel, a crab, and a fish landing next to him, in his boat.

"Cool." he said. All of a sudden, a giant star fish rose up out of the water. "Everybody, quickly, paddle toward land!" Axel shouted, paddling toward land. Through the whole trip, he was the only one to do anything.

-----

A yellow sponge, wearing his work clothes, walked up to the frog.

"Excuse me, do you know where the Krusty Krab is?" the sponge asked. Kermit pointed his firearm at the sponge.

"The same way you came back!" he shouted, firing his weapon, sending the sponge flying back, laughing idiotically. It was then that Axel ran up to the frog.

"Hey, frogman, we need your help!" Axel said, he pointed at the large starfish, towering above them. Kermit pointed his gun upward, as Axel ran away, leaving his catch behind.

"Pissed off Xemnas or not, it's better than this crap!" he shouted.

-----

Luxord stumbled home, meeting Axel at the doors.

"How was your day?" Axel asked.

"Drunk." Luxord responded.

"Okay, then." Axel said, in a confused tone. He followed Luxord back into the castle.

**Luxord's Odd Day, Coming Soon**


End file.
